"Lord of the Flies" comes to Morning Song...

Yesterday Sasha was still feeling a little weak so he stayed "home". We rode the Gazelle (him on the Kinder-seat up front) to Poggio in Sausalito. Our morning was spent relaxing, sipping tea, eating samples and talking. It was heavenly!

Just before lunch we rode to Mill Valley to clean-up/warm-up (take tub and shower)and fill our bellies with some soup and fresh bread. As we were getting ready to sit down I received the phone call that all parents dread, "Please come and pick-up Jonas from school, we are having some behavioural problems". The teacher elaborated. It seems Jonas, along with two other kids (girls none the less so all of you thinking boys will be boys can toss that idea), had been kicking the youngest and smallest boy in school. Three on one and Jonas had on his new (handed down from Sasha) Cowboy boots! Oh no!

When we arrived Jonas was clearly embarrassed but also smirking (this could be from me, I have been told I have a tendency to smirk when I am really uncomfortable). Here was one of those huge tests of my parenting abilities.I had better do this right .

I took him aside, explained that his kicking feet are meant to kick balls and, given he had shown he was not yet old enough to understand that, his pointy cowboy boots would have to go away. We drove straight to the donation place at Safeway, I took off his boots and handed them to the "man in the truck". At first Jonas thought I was bluffing. It took him a moment and then it sunk in, his boots were really gone. As he began to wail I wondered if I had done the right thing (too harsh?). In that moment, all I wanted to do was to hold him and make it better, but I resisted the urge.

We went home where he spent story and resting time alone in his bed. When we finally got up, I asked him to make the boy from school a card. He drew a beautiful card, unusual for Jonas as he still likes to mainly scribble, and HE suggested we add a book to the apology card. This is HUGE as books are like gold in our family. I know I let out an inner sigh at that moment. He had gotten it!I finally allowed myself to take him in my arms and hug him.

People often say that parents are what influence children the most, up until they are teens that is. Today was a day where I had influence and knew what to do, more or less. The next one might not be so clear, and when I need help, let's hope that my pool of support has the wisdom to help me through.

Jakub being sentimental...

I am IM'ing with my mom, something I could not have imagined only a few years ago, while listening to this song Jakub sent me from Hamburg ...and fading, quickly....life is not easy but thank God it is great! Gotta love technology.

BTW some pics from Lizabeth from Martinmas and one from last year.Sorry about the resolution, I will fix it later.

Life on both sides of the Atlantic

Jakub has been in Hamburg for almost 2 weeks. While he misses us terribly(hiding in nice bars for drinks with friends, having dinner at posh restaurants, running to avoid getting soaked in the rains) we sit here in sunny Northern California missing him (while we have play dates, go for Martinmas Lantern walks, fold piles of laundry, deal with illness). Yes life on both sides of the Atlantic seems to have its pros and cons.

It was pointed out to me today, albeit indirectly, that I may have a slight tendency to express (while not inwardly focusing on) the negative side of things in my Heim. I read a blog from "The Replacements" as we endearingly all the American family, also from SF, that came to Hamburg just after us. If I am not mistaken, my tales of hellish days in Hamburg are not only referenced, but dramatized to a point of being, well, blogworthy. In fact, it appears that my stories were so inspiring, "do-over days", as they are referred to, have now come to have a special name, mine! Here is the excerpt.

"Today was a classic “do-over” day. In fact, we heard about another American couple who moved to Hamburg for a stay and the wife had many such days … we heard about the day the bike broke down and no one would help, despite the fact she had two small children who were all stranded with her; how the neighbors never ONCE in the entire year, said hello to her; how in anticipation of the move, she alerted her neighbors that they would be moving and to expect the elevator to be busy only to discover some un-named neighbor had written on her note that the elevators were not to be used for moving that if they were damaged they would hold her responsible. In general, she did not find the German experience a hospitable one and at about 1 pm today I, too, was ready to throw in the towel. We have named this type of day a “N*$#CC day” in her honor (I removed the name to protect her as I am sure she had a great time and would resent us using her stories in this way; I know I would)."

I think it is time to make an early resolution, be more Pollyanaish (believe or not there was a time in my life when people hurled this at me as an insult).You do remember Pollyana, the gal from the 60's Disney movie who saw the glass as half-full no matter what. Perhaps I lost my inner Pollyana when I started working on exotic invasives, perhaps when I met the man who's favourite quote is "When life gives you lemons...make lemonade." Who knows....all I can say is I will try, for the sake of posterity, to express more of my inner Pollyana. That said, nothing goes better with sweet than a little bitter:-)